Today, I am going to explain why people who say they want to change often end up not changing, and what keeps them from doing so.
First, let’s try changing the place where we live.
If you want to change your life, the first thing you should do is change your environment.
When you stay in the same place, you tend to conform to the rules of that place, whether consciously or not. For example, think about someone whose character changes when they’re in the United States versus when they’re in Mexico. This is because their environment is different, and the change in their personality is a result of that.
Similarly, you may know people whose personalities seem different when they’re speaking English versus when they’re speaking Spanish. This is true for most people to some extent.
The people you interact with on a daily basis are different depending on whether you’re speaking English or Spanish. Your home, your favorite shops, your workplace, and your community are all part of your environment. Therefore, one of the most effective ways to change your life is to be brave and leave that environment.
Moving is often the quickest way to change your environment. You may think moving is too difficult, but is it really?
You might have many reasons why you can’t move, such as having a mortgage or not knowing if you’ll find a cheaper place to rent.
You might love your current home or enjoy the convenience of having a nearby supermarket. However, if you reconsider each of these factors, you might find that moving isn’t as impossible as you thought.
Ultimately, it comes down to whether you truly want to change.
Keep in mind that the human brain is wired to unconsciously find reasons not to change.
With the understanding that changing your living situation is the quickest way to forcibly change your situation, I would like to suggest other things you can do.
Let’s learn to realize if we have resisted change
This is related to your mindset.
Train yourself to notice when you are unconsciously searching for reasons why the human brain doesn’t change when you are about to take action.
When you start to think, “Am I resisting change?” your life will change.
Can you remember what drink you ordered at the cafe you last visited?
If you can remember, you have probably only ordered that drink.
Is it because it is truly the best drink?
If you think it’s the best and you order it, that’s great.
However, what if you usually order your regular coffee even if you find an unfamiliar drink on the menu?
I repeat again, the human brain is unconsciously searching for reasons not to change. Perhaps your brain is choosing the coffee you ordered because it is afraid of change. Maybe there is a drink you like more, but you never tried it.
Even if you don’t like it, trying something else once carries little risk.
For those who want to change something in their current life, start by developing the habit of thinking, “Oh, my brain just made an unchanging choice,” when you are about to order your regular coffee.
This is called metacognition.
It is essential for humans to objectively view their thoughts and actions. This skill is valuable not only in studying but also in making business decisions.
To make significant changes in life, you need to start with small things. Why not try changing the order in which you put on your shoes or shampoo and wash your body, or visiting a shop in your neighborhood that you have never been to before, or changing the route you take to work?
Can’t see how such things can change your life? Are you still making unchanging choices unconsciously?
There is research that shows significant changes in human life are brought about by weak ties.
There are strong ties and weak ties. Strong ties refer to people who are always receiving information, such as family, close friends, or colleagues at work.
Weak ties refer to people with whom you only exchange greetings when walking in the park or people you talked to once or twice at a bar or people whose columns you happened to read in a magazine.
These weak ties, in fact, have a significant impact on your life.
